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In the following 8 articles ... I would like to share some important keys of personal transformation with you.

Article #1

Personal Transformation

The focus will be on the all important aspect of your ‘style’, your ‘image’.

These keys are outlined in detail in my new e-book: The Image Keys to Personal Transformation.

The reality of our world is that we are influenced to a huge degree by our personal appearance. Whether we like to admit it or not, as human beings we tend to ‘judge a book by its cover’. I will help you find out why we do this and how to stop doing this to each other, but most importantly, how to stop judging ourselves first.

In these eight articles, I would like to afford you an opportunity to begin to master your style and your image, thereby generating even greater success in your life, career, and business.

“I believe the most important single thing, beyond discipline and creativity, is daring to dare” – Maya Angelou

The Primacy Effect

Research has proved that it takes less than 15 seconds to make a lasting first impression. Researchers call this the Primacy Effect, a term coined by Michael Shea. The more fast-paced our lives become, the quicker we form these value-judgments of each other. We tell ourselves that we don’t have time to waste in traffic, on the telephone, in stores, and certainly not with other people either! You might say that you never judge a book by its cover, but have you ever had doubts about whether a scruffy-looking sales clerk would actually be able to assist you in a professional way? If you have, you have experienced the Primacy Effect first-hand. Corporate Image Consulting has become a multi-billion dollar industry because of the Primacy Effect, and even outside of the office, we are being indoctrinated by the messages that we need to dress to ‘fit in’, or else face rejection from those around us.

The Primacy Effect Unmasked

I have been fascinated by this Primacy Effect for years. I wanted to understand why we do this to each other, because in my mind it seemed so unfair! Why could we not just let each other be? I wanted to know how we could stop it, only to be told by many reputable sources such as psychologists, that this initial judgement of others was part of human nature.

Recently I found an answer and it is rooted in Metaphysics. The value judgement made by others, within 7- 15 seconds of meeting one another for the first time, in reality reflects the way we see ourselves, which is directly linked to the deep-seated beliefs we hold about ourselves. Society, including the media, fashion, and so on, leads us to believe that it is perfectly acceptable and ‘normal’ to ‘judge a book by its cover’. The more we buy into this and compare ourselves to nearly unattainable ideals, that is, to look like skinny fashion models, have flawless beauty, everlasting youth and wear designer clothing, the more we tend to judge ourselves for not being perfect and the more others around us will ‘mirror’ this back to us.

Ask yourself: do I know people who are far from perfect physically, but who radiate such inner beauty, confidence and charisma that I am drawn to them like a magnet? I am sure you can picture someone.

Then there are other famous people such as Bill Gates who never wears ‘flashy’ outfits and doesn’t need to advertise his wealth. Does this make him seem any less of a genius to us? Of course not! Another famous example is our own Madiba, who is known all over the world for his ‘madiba shirt’, a simple, long-sleeved, buttoned-up shirt worn loosely over his pants. Some sceptics might say he has earned the right to wear whatever he likes, which is true, but he would never have got that far if he did not believe in himself and his cause, the way he did.

WOULD YOU LIKE TO HAVE CHARISMA TOO?

Anyone can have it! I am going to show you how your deep-seated negative beliefs about yourself (I’m not good enough, I’m useless, I don’t deserve this, etc.) are unconsciously incorporated in your presentation of yourself to others. Because everyone we encounter is our ‘mirror’, these beliefs become even more ingrained in us when we receive negative ‘vibes’ from our environment.

We are especially sensitive to the feedback from others because we are constantly indoctrinated by the media. For instance, we would only be OK once we attain perfection, in other words NEVER! The media is of course also a big mirror reflecting our collective negative beliefs to ourselves. If only we can understand the ‘message’ from all these mirrors, we can free ourselves and break the vicious cycle forever.

Are you perhaps cloaking your true value in unflattering garments, because deep down, you feel you are worthless, unlovable, or not good enough? Alternatively, are you perhaps so obsessed with your own image and insist on wearing only the latest, most expensive designer labels, because you feel inadequate otherwise?  So, we all know that beauty should come from within, but we are visual beings!

Research has proved that humans retain visual imagery for much longer than any other sensory imagery. When I read this for the first time, I realized why I have trouble remembering people’s names when being introduced to someone. It’s because I’m usually so busy looking at them that I am not listening effectively!

If you choose to do so, you can use this trait of being a ‘visual’ being to your own advantage. By loving what you see in the mirror every day, you are taking a huge step in the right direction: the more you love that mirror-image of yourself and affirm your true beauty and self-worth on a daily basis, the more you start transforming those false perceptions and beliefs you hold about yourself. It is a way to build up your self-esteem, from the outside inwards. Best of all, you can have a lot of fun while doing it too! Your goal: to become the best possible version of your true self.

I will help you love ‘the skin you are in’ by showing you how beautiful and perfect you are right now. All you have to do is BELIEVE it!..... and others will mirror that back to you!

Are you ready for the transformation?

The following chart summarizes our first important Key. TAKE ACTION NOW AND TURN YOUR GOALS INTO REALITY!

Key

Goal

Action

Due Date

Key no 1: As humans we judge each other as a result of constantly judging ourselves.

To love my own mirror image and build my self-esteem from outside inwards. This way I will become less critical of myself and others.

Affirm my true beauty and self worth every day, preferably in the mirror.

........ Next time we will examine the ever elusive concept of style and I will show you how absolutely anybody can be stylish…

Note: The content of this article is copyright of Suzaan Lane and may not be reproduced in any form without prior consent from the author.

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